Snog (I'm assuming I can also get some foreplay in there with this one too?): Hayley Williams; cause I bet she's dead naughty with the foreplay but a bit rubbish in bed.
Bed: Emma Watson (pre-haircut); so I could make awesomely cool jokes about her making me shoot my silver patronus from my wand.
Marry: Pixie Lott; met her once, she's really nice and also wasn't totally disgusted by my telling her I'd let her sit on my face forever, so she seems like the perfect woman.
Would avoid: Airsoft-Ed
Edit: And if I can throw a pornstar into the mix; Lexi Belle. Om nom nom.